One of the most unfortunate things about life is that you can never really know for sure where your choices will take you, but when you try to imagine the life of another person flowing into the future it's pretty easy to see where they're going to go. Why do we feel like we can foresee the future of others but not our own? Why is what I should do not clear to me?

We fail to accept for ourselves the fates we assign to others. I suppose so much of everything is inevitable in the end that fighting it is how we subconsciously entertain ourselves. How boring would life really be if we always did what we told someone else they should do? "Stay away from that guy!" Please, and miss out on all that tasty drama? "I don't think you should unicycle on that bridge railing!" Come on, if I fall I'll fall toward the bridge, not away from it.

But really, making choices in life sucks. I feel consumed by a paralyzing fear that I am just wasting my time, and I try to convince myself that I have nothing but time to waste but I really don't feel like I do anymore. I've only got another 40 to 60 years of my life left, and I'm only going to be young for so many of them. What are the chances that I'll be George Clooney and still be all smokin' hot and charismatic at 50? Fuckin' slim. Real fuckin' slim.

So what do I do?

I guess I should just do what I'd tell someone who isn't me.