Sometimes if I sit in one place long enough I feel as if I am being
uprooted from whatever scene I’m within. I turn into an observer, but
what I am witnessing is unfamiliar to me and I’m not sure what my
position within it is. There’s a cool floating sensation involved, even,
and a warm buzzing in my skin. Pretty rad.

God, if I spelled his name wrong then I really am a twat.

I don’t like Kerouac. Can’t manage to read it.

When I was 17, a 22 year old friend of mine (Dan Crum) moved out to California from Illinois to stay with me and my then girlfriend. He stayed for a few months but couldn’t find work, so he left, after a lot of fighting over money and arguments possibly encouraged by my ex.

Now I’m 23 and I feel like I want to spend the summer doing something interesting, and also like I need to escape from Los Angeles for a while and see what life is like other places. I asked Dan, who lives back in Dekalb, Illinois, if I could come stay with him for the summer. He said sure.

I’m writing this on my phone and I’d be lying if I said it wasn’t positively exhausting.

All in all, I am unsure. He said it was scary and exciting, moving to LA randomly, and the thought of relocating randomly to 40 minutes south of Chicago seems, well, terrifying and somewhat exciting. I can take the summer off of school and see what life is like in other parts of the country. Sounds win, right?

I want to do something, you know? So I shouldn’t be such a wuss and just do it, otherwise I know I’ll regret it. I don’t know. Am I being foolish? Anyone?

“OH MY GOD, JAY! You’re eating a frozen slice of american cheese! What in the hell? Look at yourself! Back in freshman year of high school we were all so full of HOPE and POTENTIAL–so MUCH potential! And now look at you! You’re sitting on ROBERT’S couch, eating a FROZEN PIECE OF CHEESE with HONEY. Wake up! We all need to wake the fuck up!”