I remarked to my buddy that I was worried that YACHT would, in some way, suck live. Why, he asked me, do you think that? I told him that it just seemed like there was a lot that could go wrong: the chick could be an awful singer live; they could be like MGMT and just be completely unable to pull off their album sound in a live setting; somehow they could fail to get the crowd hyped up… The worries were mostly silly, but they were there, and while we walked the UCSD campus I mulled over them.

When we walked into The Loft (which is so hip and modern looking it almost seems satirical) we walked right past YACHT themselves, Jona Bechtolt and Claire L. Evans, who were sharing a chair next to the merch table (which was loaded with interesting things, mainly a tiny little book exploring the YACHT philosophy or something or another that I wish I bought and a mixtape for $5 which I also wish I had bought). I gawked for a second at the musicians (they’re so pretty and mysterious!), then went and had a cigarette.

Though the opening act was just a guy with a laptop and a microphone, who danced to his music while singing the vocals, I didn’t expect YACHT to be the same, but they were, except that there were two microphones and two people on stage and one of them was a woman who was nicer to look at than the guy. They had banners on stage saying various YACHT philosophy things, but aside from that the game was pretty much the same. Oh, and their mic cables were way longer.

Part way through opener Ring The Bell (which has since become my favorite YACHT song so you can listen to it right now

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if you so choose, of course) the entire sound system died and we were left with Jona (in a white suit kinda like a geeky Southern Baptist preacher) and Claire standing on stage holding their microphones, obviously a metaphor for their dicks. Jona took this opportunity to show us an elaborate slideshow showing us where they have recently flown from (New York) and are going to (China!) along with a zoom in on their apartment in Portland, complete with Street View and posted address. Jona explained, “It’s only fair that since we came to your city to see you, you can come to our city to see us. Go ahead, take a picture of the address.”

Once the sound system got back up and running they played I’m in Love With a Ripper which also killed the sound system. (Jona shouted, “What kind of college is this! How much do you guys pay for this sound system!” and at the end his voice cracked, and Claire suitably mocked him when she made her voice crack the next time she said something.)

From that point onward the show went on without a hitch, Jona and Claire dancing in their weird but no less interesting and generally always fresh kind of way (lots of jerky movements and dropping down and popping up) and singing the songs. During Summer Song they came down into the audience and a guy in a flannel shirt went dance crazy all over Claire, followed her back up onto stage, and proceeded to dance like a maniac. Some fat girl who should have been trying to hold as still as possible to prevent her from jiggling all over the place just by standing, was wiggling her shit all over the stage—until she tripped on a speaker and nearly ate shit. (A feat she avoided later when she almost fell on me walking away from the stage.) The whole thing was highly entertaining.

There was a discussion about Jona and Claire’s fathers when the question and answer session was interrupted by a shouted, “Who is your daddy and what does he do?” (we were an audience of college kids after all) that Jona decided to take seriously (either that or Jona and Claire are really unfamiliar with Schwarzenegger’s seminal work). There was dancing (none of it by me, though I moved my hips a little bit), the bass made my hair vibrate, and they played a song I’d never heard that went something like “Blow your brains out, do the Kurt Cobain, do the Kurt Cobain” which was pretty much the best thing I’ve ever heard and after I publish this I’m going to go find it and rock the fuck out in this library.

Really they just seemed like two kids (though Jona is 28) having a good time, dancing on stage and singing some good songs. (I’m really envious that this Jona guy gets to fly all over the world with his girlfriend and perform on stage for people and all he needs to do it is a laptop and two microphones, talk about living the fucking dream!) I was disappointed that they never, say, brought a real live guitar or any sort of instrument (not even a harmonica) into the fray, but more than that I enjoy that I got to hear their music, studio quality and flawlessly performed, through a big sound system, with live vocals (and that’s all that really matters anyway). It sounded good, I was entertained, I’d definitely go see YACHT again (and drive to San Diego to do it if I have to!), but damn I wish I had bought their merch.